Thursday, October 28, 2010

Ow Ow Ow My Face Is On Fire Holy Hell It Hurts Chili

Yesterday I decided to revisit my chili. I wasn't happy with how it turned out last time, and really - how hard is crock pot chili?

I begin cutting up the veggies...2 onions (complete with burning and tearing eyes), garlic, a green pepper, and...a jalapeno. I always knew that jalapeno peppers left oils on your hands so that you aren't supposed to touch your face after you handle them. I decide to wash my hands. And I wash them again. And then one more time for good measure. The oil should be off, right?

I take the chopped meat out of the package to find that apparently it was beginning to go bad. Time to run out to the store. I decide that since the baby is fed and happy that I would take a quick shower before I go out. I soap up, wash my hair, and move to my face. Oh crap - the oil is still on my hands. OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!

After about 5 minutes of standing under the water trying to get the jalapeno oil off without using my hands, I get out of the shower and dry off. Now for those of you who know me, you know that I'm pretty much blind without my glasses. The only reason I didn't have my contacts in while I was in the shower was because of the chance there was oil on my hands. I figured that since I washed my hands and took a shower that the oil had to be off of me by now, right? I go to put my contacts in, and OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW! Alright...glasses it is.

I head on over to the grocery store, pick up what I need, and come back home. I brown the meat and throw everything into the crock pot. Kelly comes home and makes himself a plate to bring to work. Apparently it wasn't that good. Well I went to all of that trouble to make it, so there's no way I'm eating crappy chili again. I throw in some more salt, chili powder, another onion, cayenne pepper, hot sauce, and believe it or not a half a can of beer. I let it cook for about another hour, and it turned out pretty good! Yay me!

Lessons learned:

1) Jalapeno oil sucks...make sure you get it ALL off before you touch anything
2) The more onions the better
3) Beer is for more than drinking
4) I like it hot

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